Ultimate Sacrifice
by EternalLove
Summary: After wishing the past to be reversed, Kagome finds herself a ghostly shadow in Inuyasha's world. Midoriko becomes her guardian, helping her find the meaning of her existence, while she looks after a certain dog youkai facing dangerous problems of his own
1. Chapter One

She did it. She had hopped from foot to foot, restlessly observing the others fight on with  
  
Shippo in her arms. She couldn't do anything. Not without risking herself and the others in  
  
danger. And what could she do? She still hadn't tapped into the full potential of her miko  
  
powers and her arrows were all spent. By foolishly running into the battle would mean  
  
Inuyasha would have to run over and try to protect her. So she had no other choice but to  
  
stand and wait. But she had to do something. Anything, if it meant that this could be over.  
  
And so she did it. She reached deep within herself, in a place she never knew she had. She  
  
begged, pleaded, and urged her inner soul to create some sort of a miracle. Her soul  
  
somehow listened to her cries and she could feel a sort of calm coming over her body, as if  
  
everything would be alright. Her hand rose up on it's own and the shards hanging on her neck  
  
jumped to her palm. From far away, the shikon inside Naraku split itself from him and started  
  
to glide over to her awaiting hand. Enraged at what she had done Naraku started to make his  
  
way towards her but was blocked by Inuyasha. With all the shards in her hand she closed it  
  
and made a gentle fist. When she opened her palm again, the jewel was complete. "Make a  
  
wish." she whispered to herself. She gave a quiet laugh, it was almost like a birthday, almost.  
  
But how could she word exactly what she wanted in her heart? What she wanted was in such a  
  
tumble and disarray of words and thoughts that she found that she couldn't say anything. A  
  
cry from the battlefield made her head snap up. It was Sango and a tiger youkai had bitten her  
  
on the leg. Blood was dripping down from the wound and Miroku had run over to help.  
  
Kagome could feel her legs trying to move to Sango, but she had something to do if she  
  
wanted to end all of this. She opened her mouth and a steady stream of words came out.  
  
"I wish that all the destruction that the Shikon and Naraku made never happened. I wish that  
  
everybody who's lives had been affected from it would be back to normal. I wish-I wish that  
  
everything that led up to this point hadn't happened!"  
  
She could hear a voice echoing inside her head, a female one.  
  
"Be careful of what you wish for."  
  
Before Kagome could ask who it was the Shikon in her hand started to glow and beams of  
  
purple light began to escape from the jewel. It covered everything like a dense fog till  
  
Kagome couldn't see anything. She blinked once and she was suddenly in Inuyasha forest.  
  
What had happened to her wish? Her feet took her along the familiar path till she reached the  
  
clearing with the well. But the well looked new, as if Inuyasha had never stuck a tree down  
  
there. And the imprint of his body on Goshinboku was gone as well. She didn't stop to think  
  
for an answer but turned around and ran all the way back to the village. There were village  
  
children picking flowers and laughing but none of them greeted Kagome's figure. In fact, they  
  
acted as if she was not there at all. At Kaede's hut Kagome was about to go inside when  
  
someone stepped through the doorway.....and through her. She had raised her hands to stop  
  
the person but they went right through her hands as if they were nothing. As if they were air.  
  
She looked down at her hands and noticed that there was a faintly glow to them. Very light in  
  
the sun's rays but still noticable enough. She pressed against the wooden walls of the hut and  
  
her hands went straight through without an obstacle. *Oh Kami, no. Please tell me I'm not a  
  
ghost. Please please please* Her knees buckled and she fell hard to the ground but she felt no  
  
pain. Nothing. She had become nothing. She could feel nothing and she could do nothing.  
  
Voices from behind her caught her attention and she turned her head. It was Inuyasha  
  
and...Kikyo?! The two were laughing and talking with all the joy that Kagome couldn't feel.  
  
Fingers intertwined with each other but fell apart whenever some villager passed by. As if  
  
they were some-some shy couple? What had happened to her world?  
  
"It was your wish."  
  
Kagome looked up to see a young woman standing beside her, dressed in armor with the  
  
clothing of a miko underneath. Her head was faced towards Inuyasha and Kikyo with a look of  
  
remembrance and regret in her face. When she looked down at the young girl on her knees  
  
Kagome gave a gasp.  
  
"Midoriko??"  
  
"Yes. And it appears that you are stuck, just like me."  
  
"But-how-this-"  
  
Midoriko gave a hand to Kagome to help her stand up. Kagome hesitantly took it and gave a  
  
sigh of relief when her hand made contact with Midoriko's as she pulled herself up.  
  
"It was your wish." Midoriko repeated, her face turning back to the couple.  
  
"My wish turned me into a ghost?"  
  
"Your wish was to reverse the effects of the Shikon and Naraku but only half of your wish was  
  
granted. That is everything was reversed up till the point that Kikyo was guarding the  
  
Shikon."  
  
"What about Naraku?"  
  
"He was erased from the world altogether."  
  
"Then, why am I like this?"  
  
"Kikyo is alive and well, meaning her soul is whole. The only reason you existed in modern  
  
times was because you had Kikyo's soul to sustain you. Without Kikyo's soul, you are just a  
  
shadow of another dimension."  
  
"Just a shadow?"  
  
"If you were a ghost, you would give off energy from your soul. Watch."  
  
Midoriko started to walk near the couple and both began to shiver. They rubbed their arms  
  
and started to look around them cautiously. Midoriko moved away but the two still had  
  
puzzled looks on their faces.  
  
"A shadow is someone without any energy inside themselves, or without a soul in simpler  
  
terms." Midoriko explained. "It was why Kikyo was able to pass through you without feeling  
  
anything."  
  
Kagome wished she could lean against something for comfort but she would pass right  
  
through. Somehow....somehow everything made sense. Of course she wouldn't be alive in her  
  
world, she never received Kikyo's soul so she couldn't exist. And yet, denial was screaming in  
  
her mind. Screaming horrible but truthful things and she could feel her hoping sinking  
  
quickly. She was a shadow, just a small memory of some other dimension, some other world.  
  
A world where she existed and when a love between her and Inuyasha would have been  
  
possible. Back then, she had known that there wasn't much of a chance of Inuyasha returning  
  
her love, but there was still a little chance. Now, she didn't have anything. No hope at all  
  
because she was just a shadow. *It's what you wished, you wished for things to be like this*  
  
While her mind tried to use logic her heart bravely resisted. *Wish for things to be like this?  
  
I'm nothing now, nothing!* A tear trickled down her face, followed by another and another.  
  
She took no notice of the salty drops sliding down her cheek. Everything in her universe had  
  
centered to one thing, she was a shadow. She could feel desperation at her current situation  
  
and Midoriko took notice of this. But she gave no kind words to her, instead she grabbed her  
  
by her shoulders and gave her a forceful shake.  
  
"You will not despair young miko! I have watched you through your years and never once  
  
have I seen you show weakness. Don't you dare start now, not when there are things to be  
  
done! There will always be obstacles in life, even in death! And you can't escape the fact that  
  
you are a shadow by turning into some weak little child. Now stop your pitiful crying because  
  
it is not the person you are inside."  
  
Kagome made no movement to wipe away the tears on her face and only looked into  
  
Midoriko's face with sad eyes.  
  
"Who am I then? If I have no soul, then who can I be? A soul is what makes you who you are,  
  
and I have none."  
  
Midoriko took Kagome into her arms and hugged her as a mother would.  
  
"I cannot tell you who you are right now, not until the time is right. But you are who you are  
  
Kagome, nothing inside you has changed. You may be a shadow, but you are still Kagome, no  
  
matter what happens. Don't ever forget that. Death cannot change who the person was in life,  
  
and even your wish cannot alter that. Doubting yourself is the first step towards being  
  
nothing."  
  
"But I have no soul." Kagome whispered into Midoriko's clothing.  
  
"No, you do not. But we can change your physical being."  
  
Kagome pulled herself from Midoriko, wiping away the tears on her face.  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
The miko smiled as all signs of despair flew from Kagome's face.  
  
"There is a way to make you have at least a more solid form."  
  
"How? Is it even possible?"  
  
"It is more possible for you than it is for me."  
  
"How?" Kagome pleaded, ignoring a hidden meaning in the miko's words.  
  
"Toutousai."  
  
"Eh??! The old man who made Inuyasha's sword?"  
  
"He should have the solution to your problem."  
  
"But...can he even see me?"  
  
"Yes, he and I talk frequently. You will have to go on your own though, I have other things to  
  
attend to."  
  
"It's so far."  
  
"Kagome, you can fly there."  
  
"Fly??"  
  
"Observe."  
  
Midoriko began to gently float up in the air, turning this way and that. She floated back to the  
  
ground gracefully.  
  
"Sugoi, maybe this shadow thing isn't so bad. I've always wanted to fly on my own."  
  
"Or you can teleport yourself there."  
  
"Shadows can teleport too?" she brightened a little.  
  
"Shadows can do many things, maybe even more than ghosts can." Midoriko said in a serious  
  
tone. Kagome opened her mouth to say something but closed it. There seemed to be some  
  
sort of secret fact behind shadows that Midoriko wasn't telling. But Kagome was patient and  
  
she had all the time in the world, literally.  
  
"Flying comes naturally to all ghosts and shadows, all you need is a simple thought.  
  
Teleporting is similar to this only you imagine your destination and it takes a bit more  
  
energy. Try it."  
  
Kagome thought about flying and could feel her feet rising off the ground. After a few minutes  
  
of flying around Kaede's hut Kagome stopped and floated in mid air. She closed her eyes and  
  
tried to imagine the inside of Kaede's hut. She disappeared and opened her eyes to see the  
  
dimly lit room of Kaede's house. Midoriko walked through Kaede's walls.  
  
"You catch on very quickly."  
  
"It feels so natural and so much more easier than just walking."  
  
Midoriko considured what Kagome said very carefully and gave a grin.  
  
"Good, now think of Toutousai's house and you should be there. I'd say in a few hours you  
  
barely need to even think about flying."  
  
Kagome reached over and gave Midoriko a tight hug.  
  
"Thank you...for being there when I didn't know."  
  
"It's what a guardian is suppose to do."  
  
"Thanks."  
  
With just a single thought Kagome disappeared from Midoriko's arms and off to find an  
  
answer to her problems.  
  
*Ahh, first chapter done. I really don't know why I'm so happy. I think it's because I really like this story so far. feedback/reviews please! 


	2. Chapter Two

The acrid scent of ash and smoke dominated her nose as she peered around the dark  
  
and gloomy setting of Toutousai's home. She had luckily managed to transport herself  
  
directly in front of some large skull instead of on the lava, not that she would have felt  
  
the pain anyway. But it felt so normal to worry about catching her feet on fire. Hot  
  
liquid bubbled on the murky surface, creating sporadic pockets of heat. While any  
  
normal mortal would have gotten third degree burns from just the heat alone, all she  
  
could feel was a pleasant warmth on her skin. Taking a deep and self assuring breath she  
  
lifted her foot to step into the gaping mouth of the skull but was stopped by a booming  
  
voice from within.  
  
"I DON'T MAKE SWORDS ANYMORE SO LEAVE!"  
  
"Ano...I'm not here for-"  
  
"I DON'T MAKE SWORDS SO LEAVE!"  
  
"But I don't need a-"  
  
"LEAVE!"  
  
She could feel her temper rising at his interruptions and she took a defiant stance, feet  
  
planted firmly on the ground and hands on her waist.  
  
"Now wait a second, I'm not here for a sword because I can't hold one. I'm a ghost and  
  
Midoriko sent me so stop interrupting when I'm trying to explain why I'm here!!!"  
  
A long pause followed, so long that Kagome thought perhaps the old man didn't hear  
  
her.  
  
"Well...why didn't you say so then? Ghosts these days, take all the time in the world just  
  
because they're dead. Slow as a slug if you ask me, in both mind and manner." the voice  
  
grumbled.  
  
Kagome gave a roll of her eyes and entered the skull. It had a dank smell and the walls  
  
didn't reflect the light of the fire on the forge. Toutoutsai was sitting on a ratty old mat  
  
with a pipe in his mouth, smoke curling out like ribbons. His eyes were closed and he  
  
appeared to be sleeping. Kagome walked closer and waved a hand in front of his face.  
  
Her grandfather always seemed to fall asleep at odd moments, perhaps Toutousai was  
  
the same? She gave a startled jump when he opened one eye. The eye casually rolled up  
  
and scrutinized her very closely.  
  
"Hmph, you're not a ghost."  
  
She chagrined at her mistake.  
  
"Erm, a shadow I mean."  
  
The other eye opened and he looked at her even more carefully now.  
  
"Shadow eh? Hmmm."  
  
He puffed on the pipe deeply and smoke escaped out of his nose, giving him the  
  
appearance of a worn out dragon.  
  
"Midoriko sent me here because you had something that would make me more solid."  
  
"I don't have it."  
  
"EHH??!! What do you mean you don't have it?!"  
  
"Don't have it." he said nonchalantly.  
  
Midoriko had told her that Toutousai had a way, perhaps she was mistaken?  
  
"What are you looking so down for?"  
  
"Midoriko told me you would-"  
  
"Heh, you think I'd actually go through the trouble of getting the darn ring?"  
  
"Ring?"  
  
"It would be impossible! Though more possible for me than it would be for her. And  
  
more possible for you than it would be for both of us." he continued, ignoring Kagome's  
  
question and confusing her even further.  
  
"Wait wait, is it a ring? How does it work? Where can I find it?"  
  
"Young people these days!!!! Always asking questions then acting like they know  
  
everything. I give them a century or two before they start shaping up!!" he bursted out  
  
in aggravation.  
  
"Mah mah" Kagome said, putting up her hands in peace. "I was just wondering how  
  
could such powerful and important knowledge ever come into your great hands." she  
  
said in a soothing tone.  
  
"Well, if you really want to know...." Kagome leaned closer and he went on. "I happened  
  
to find it by chance. Of course it was only a story but I never forgot the directions." he  
  
said, tapping his head with his pipe.  
  
"Really? That's so interesting." she cooed.  
  
"Forgot the name of it but there's only one in this world and only a shadow can get it  
  
and use it. It lies in a different dimension that's connected to this world, some small  
  
cave on Heaven Top Mountain."  
  
"Where is Heaven Top Mountain?"  
  
"Great mountain in the west, you can't miss it."  
  
"Thank you for the information, bye!"  
  
Kagome imagined Kaede's hut and soon the pungent scent of smoke was gone and  
  
replaced with the cool and refreshing aroma of forest trees.  
  
"Back so soon? I thought Toutousai would go off on his ghost lecture." Midoriko said.  
  
"He did. Also on how rude young people are these days."  
  
The miko gave a grin.  
  
"He's a nice old man all the same. So what did he tell you?"  
  
"The ring is located on Heaven Top Mountain." Kagome repeated Toutousai's words.  
  
"Heaven Top Mountain?"  
  
She floated to the top of Kaede's roof and balanced gracefully on the edge. She  
  
thoughtfully rubbed her chin while looking at the sky.  
  
"Heaven Top Mountain..." she repeated.  
  
Kagome joined her up there and sat next to her.  
  
"Any idea where exactly it is?"  
  
"I think I remember hearing something about it but I can't remember. It's in the west,  
  
right?" Midoriko's face was turned towards the west, as if she could discern it already.  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Well, let's get floating. The sooner you have it the better, time is pressing close."  
  
"Time?" Kagome blurted out. "Don't we have all the time in the world?"  
  
Midoriko took her gaze from the land afar and looked at Kagome.  
  
"Even the dead have duties."  
  
"I take it that there is some big scheme for me in the future that I'm not really aware  
  
of......again?" Kagome said in an exasperated voice.  
  
"Correct. Come, we must find this Heaven Top Mountain. I wonder why I've never seen  
  
it before."  
  
Midoriko began to race towards the west and Kagome caught up with her with ease.  
  
"He said you couldn't miss it and that it was great." she added.  
  
~One Hour Later~  
  
"This is ridiculous, we've been looking around everywhere and I don't see a great  
  
mountain." Kagome said, her hands up in defeat.  
  
"Hm." Midoriko. "You can't miss it, he said?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
Midoriko slapped her head and groaned in irritation.  
  
"That old man.....I'm betting it's some small hill that he's talking about."  
  
"Can't we ask for directions?" Kagome asked hopefully.  
  
"Who would listen? Perhaps we can look at maps.."  
  
"We can't hold them, remember? And where would we get maps?"  
  
"I know a person who has a very extensive map collection and I have enough density to  
  
at least unscroll maps."  
  
"Who's this person?"  
  
"Sesshoumaru."  
  
"Sesshoumaru??? Inuyasha's brother? He would never let us look at his maps!" the girl  
  
exclaimed.  
  
"We'll do it while he is gone. And get use to him, I have a feeling we might see more of  
  
him later on."  
  
"Wonderful, another cryptic sentence."  
  
"Come, and it's just our luck that he lives near here. See that building over in the west?"  
  
Midoriko pointed at a far off blob in the distance. Kagome closed her eyes and imagined  
  
herself at Sesshoumaru's palace. When she opened her eyes she found herself in a study  
  
and someone walked through her. She let out a yelp and closed her mouth but  
  
remembered nobody could hear her. She turned around to see Sesshoumaru sitting  
  
down at a long desk covered with papers. For the first time Kagome could see an  
  
emotion on his face, a tinge of worry. *What would he be worried about? Naraku is gone  
  
so he won't be bothered by him anymore*  
  
"There you are." Midoriko said from behind her. "I didn't realize that you knew where  
  
his map collection is."  
  
"I didn't."  
  
"Now we'll just have to wait for him to leave."  
  
"He looks busy, I don't think he'll be leaving for a while."  
  
"Hold on, I'll be right back."  
  
Midoriko disappeared and reappeared again after a minute. There was a huge crash and  
  
Sesshoumaru's head snapped up. Jaken flung open the doors and gave wheezing  
  
breaths.  
  
"M-my lord, your chandelier in the dining room crashed and Rin keeps trying to pick  
  
the pieces up with her hands."  
  
He silently stood with an air of impatience and followed Jaken out of the study.  
  
Midoriko quickly took out several scrolls from a shelf and looked through them.  
  
"Desperate times call for desperate measures...I guess." Kagome said out loud to  
  
nobody in particular. "But why a chandelier? What if Rin got hurt?" she asked Midoriko.  
  
"Hmm, not this one. Not this one either. Ah, here it is! It's....it's right near the palace."  
  
Midoriko looked on, ignoring her.  
  
"Good grief, I didn't see any 'great' mountain anywhere near the palace. You were right  
  
about it being a small hill." Kagome said, looking at the map from behind Midoriko's  
  
back.  
  
"Toutousai has a strange sense of humour." Midoriko stated as she rolled the scrolls  
  
back up. She was about to put them away when the door swung open. She immediately  
  
dropped the scrolls and Sesshoumaru's eyes narrowed. He sniffed the air and walked to  
  
where the scrolls had dropped. Midoriko quickly moved away so he wouldn't feel her  
  
aura.  
  
"Let's go before he starts suspecting something."  
  
"I think he already does."  
  
Kagome followed Midoriko up through the roof and out into the open sky. Dusk was  
  
falling fast but darkness was of no importance to ghosts. There was a small slope of a hill  
  
towards the east, the nearest hill in vicinity. Other than having a few trees there was  
  
nothing 'great' about this supposed mountain after all. With a quick eye Midoriko  
  
spotted the small opening of a cave.  
  
"Do you think anybody else has already gotten it?" Kagome asked.  
  
"Trust me, nobody but you will ever enter that cave." Midoriko stated with confidence.  
  
Kagome was about to ask why there seemed to be so much secrecy hanging around but  
  
stopped herself, Midoriko would tell her when she is ready. For now, she was content to  
  
live....to bear with ignorance for ignorance was bliss. Midoriko gave Kagome a  
  
reassuring smile as the girl reluctantly entered the dark and foreboding cave. From the  
  
size of the hill you would guess that the cave would be quite small but it seemed to go  
  
on for ages. And in a perfect straight line that tiled upwards. Pretty soon, she wasn't  
  
walking upon dark stone but a grayish blue crystal and then the crystal seemed to  
  
changed into what appeared to be sparkling white diamonds. The glitter of the path  
  
didn't hurt her eyes at all but added to the comforting feeling that nothing in this place  
  
could hurt her. Then the cave suddenly ended into a giant cavern that was made of a  
  
dull blue marble. There were no crevices in the walls, in fact, it was completely smooth  
  
everywhere. She blinked at the giant cavern and the disppearance of the friendly  
  
sparkles. But there was nothing in it. She stepped into the cavern and started to walk  
  
around, hoping to find some clue. But when she turned around the opening of the  
  
cavern was gone, nothing but a wall all around. She began to panic and desperately ran  
  
her hands over where the opening used to be, hoping to find the thin line of a doorway  
  
of some sort. Then there was a sound of steady clicking behind her, almost like the  
  
moving gears of some large machine. She slowly turned around to see the center of the  
  
giant room rise up. The stone appeared to be cradling something and she stepped  
  
closer to look. All she saw was a rusty band that had no decorations on it. She picked it  
  
up with two fingers. Was this it? This was the ring that was suppose to give her her a  
  
more physical form? Well, never judge a book by its cover, the same could be said for  
  
this ring. She slipped it on and it warped to fit around her finger perfectly. The cavern  
  
rippled like water and suddenly she was standing outside the cave's entrance. Midoriko  
  
was floating above, looking up at the sky.  
  
"Do you have it?" She asked as Kagome floated up. Kagome stuck out her hand to show it  
  
to her. Midoriko looked at it very closely, even though there wasn't anything on it. Just  
  
a plain rusty band.  
  
"Hmm, try to pick something up."  
  
Kagome floated back to the ground and picked a flower nearby. Her hand didn't grow  
  
through! There was a crack of twigs and Kagome whirled her head to see Sesshoumaru  
  
looking straight at her.  
  
______________________________________________________________  
  
*Hhm, I've got many ideas for this story that I just don't know where to start. I think that's why it took me so long to write this darn chapter. Kagome will find out more about why she became a shadow and why Midoriko isn't telling her some important things later on. Hope you enjoyed and enlighten me with some ideas on the plot, I'm open to anything new and interesting. and for those who are reading my other stories, I've updated all of them as well. unfortunately, I had to take off Trial of the Shikon Guardians because I lost my interest in that story. I thought the plot itself was unique, but I just couldn't think of anyway to get it starting again. Someone else could use the storyline if they want to, I don't mind. But I know I can't think of anything for the story. 


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